Retard CyberContainment Programme

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A picture of the RCCP

The Retard CyberContainment Programme is a social entertainment program within the Soyslum, designed to allow patients of lower intelligence, typically diagnosed with mental retardation, to have fun and relax while exploring their creativity in a safe and welcoming enviroment. It is hosted on the video game platform ROBLOX.

Details[edit | edit source]

The RCCP (Retard CyberContainment Programme) features a small Town (one of ROBLOX's many Studio Templates), but modified to suit the retards' need for fun. Below are a few changes to the original template:

  • Many noob NPCs roam around the map. Although the NPCs do not have a program which allows them to speak, and do not behave intelligently in any way or form, many 'tards believe them to be real people and befriend them. A lot of more chud-prone 'tards take their anger and many sexual frustrations out on the NPCs as well, preventing them from doing so in real life.
  • A replica of the "Killdozer", which ensures they stick to Reddit safeedgyness, and not chuddiness. The Killdozer itself is to be reffered to as the "Oofdozer" so as to avoid being prosecuted by ROBLOX moderation. The Oofdozer is very glitchy and badly made, but most of the 'tards seem not to notice. (CC CHANGE)
  • A school filled with the previously mentioned noob NPCs, but with an added school shooter. This is to teach the 'tards (many of whom are either adults or will never go near a school because they have private lessons anyways) to be afraid of public schools and run away from them, thus keeping their many usual pedophilic tendencies in check.
  • A SWAT team, multiple police cars, and multiple police officers. They were friendly at first, but then were turned hostile as a CC CHANGE.
  • Two destructible glass towers on the edge of the map and a plane. (CC CHANGE)
  • Many party hats, party signs, party tables, party lights, and other party accessories to teach the 'tards to like the Sharty and Sharty culture, dooming them to forever use the Sharty, which is very obviously one of our CIA psyops (this is a confirmed TrueFact™).
  • Bombs and swords, to help the 'tards let their frustrations out in the game, instead of in real life.

(CC Change stands for Captain Coal change. During Captain Coal's reign as administrator, he also sabotaged the RCCP project, hindering it's efforts extremely and degenerating it from a million-dollar game with astounding graphics and usability to a barely-usable buggy game (which the tards seem not to notice). His CC Changes also routinely added offensive and dangerous content that our since-lowered budget has been too low to remove)

Creation[edit | edit source]

The RCCP was originally started by the creator of 4cuck ximself, to house the then-userbase of /qa/. At the time (and possibly currently as well) the creator, Moot, believed the posters on /qa/ (also known as Sharty Oldfags) to be medically retarded. There were many reasons xe believed this to be the case, but the main reason was that he thought they thought they were using /b/ and were simply too retarded to click off /qa/. He thought that deleting the board would be a mercy, but instead opted for a "better" option - embedding a ROBLOX playerclient into the board and letting them "do their little retard things" there.

The project never progressed beyond the drawing board doe, and xis attention spam simply couldn't complete it; instead just deleting the board and going off to dilate.

After the creator's abandonment of the project, the FBI (in an unrelated incident) raided him and searched his computer. While they scrolled after the terabytes of diaper shortstack incest horse child porn (because of his status as a glowie shill), they found the details of the abandoned project and saved it for later. This would eventually lead to the FBI creating the RCCP in cooperation with the Soyslum.

Protocols[edit | edit source]

Regular Tard Playtime Protocol[edit | edit source]

The usual protocol for using the RCCP and applying the RCCP schedule is, whenever users of the Sharty or 'tard patients are acting like savages, we make our glowie agents get to work and flood the forum with multiple posts telling 'tards to join the game for "a super fun time". Make sure to be using big, short words and colorful pictures while doing this (while also providing a link). The game usually gets the 'tards to quiet down and play roblox for about 25-30 hours on average. A few Soyslum janitorfags special needs volunteers should always be available with administrator powers in the game. They should be flying in the air with godmode swithched on, away from the 'tards, and preferrably invisible. If the admins do not follow this protocol, there is an unlikely but possible event that the 'tards will reach them, or even worse, kill them (which would cause them to respawn right in the middle of tardland (the game)). Then, the 'tards would most likely promptly e-rape the administrator, which due to magik-1 (which will be expanded upon later in the article), will affect them just as if they were raped by them in real life. Notable symptoms for the administrator include:

  • Becoming infertile
  • Having trouble peeing and/or sitting down for the rest of their life
  • Their asshole becoming extremely torn
  • Lifelong PTSD and mental illness demanding Soyslum care immidiatelly

Feeding Protocol[edit | edit source]

Due to the extreme nature of the 'tards kept at the Soyslum, standard meds simply aren't effective. In order to get the 'tards their usual dose of normality, we developed an intelligent and intricate method utilising the 'tards' own special ability called "Magik" which allows them to rape our administrators. Below are the detailed instructions for going thru with the feeding protocol

  1. Make our fed accounts spring into action and advertise "a super fun time" along with the link to the game, just like with the regular Playtime protocol.
  2. Once the 'tards are settled in the game, get at least 5 normies in the game.
  3. Freeze the normies' virtual characters
  4. Allow the 'tards to suck out their souls using their "magik" abilities
  5. Allow the 'tards to play for 10 more minutes (really study them during this time)
  6. Shut down the server

Addendum[edit | edit source]

"Magik", as the 'tards refer to it, is NOT magic. All personel who have suggested such a thing slandered lord Fauci and have promptly been fired and executed. We currently believe "magik" is a byproduct of taking 500 booster shots, which is why it should be an immense secret, to avoid giving the antivaxxers more ammo against vaccination by listing another one of the "harmful side-effects".