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<pre>>ACCESSING CLEARANCE DATA...</pre>
>ACCESSING CLEARANCE DATA...
<pre>>PLEASE INPUT YOUR PASSWORD.</pre>
>PLEASE INPUT YOUR PASSWORD.
<pre>>14K1ll_4ll_k1kes88</pre>
>NUS01C4C4H8T3R41
<pre>>PASSWORD: ACCEPTED. WELCOME BACK, DR. SOYBERG.</pre>
>PASSWORD: ACCEPTED. WELCOME BACK, DR. SOYBERG.
 
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<center>'''If you need to personally contact me you can do so at 'soysylum.helpline@gmail.com'.'''</center>
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<div id="mp-tfa" style="padding:0.1em 1em 1em;">{{Objectbox|id=294|name=The Coffee Machine|threat=Sootclid|date=March 18th, 2001|author=[[User:Dr. Archivist|Dr. Archivist]]|file=2024 06 04 0lq Kleki.png}}
=== '''[[OBJ-055]]''' ===
{{Objectbox|id=055|name="goofy ahh wojak on god bruh"|threat=Thrembo|date=██████|author=[[User:Gem|gem]]}}Object File ID: 055


Threat Level: Thrembo
=== [[OBJ-294]] ===
 
Object File ID: 294
== '''Special Containment Procedures''' ==
OBJ-055 is to be kept in the basement of the 𝕏 (formerly Twitter) headquarters in San Francisco, California. Any staff or patients exposed to OBJ-055 are to be treated with [[Copium|Grade A Copium.]] In the event that OBJ-055 becomes mainstream knowledge, decoy images are to be posted on all major social networking platforms, including 4cuck and ███████. Due to the object's self-containing properties, no additional security is needed.


Threat Level: Sootclid


== '''Description''' ==
OBJ-294 is a standard coffee machine, with the only difference that it has a English QWERTY keyboard and that it runs a regular version of Linux. If fifty cents are deposited, OBJ-294 will turn on with text on it saying "Type in your drink". When this was discovered, there were 12 test logs, in which it disposed drinks within a 100-mile radius such as [[Sproke]], water, [[meds]] and many more.


After fifteen uses, OBJ-294 will no longer run for 90 minutes. Oddly, after 90 minutes, OBJ-294 would restock. Many caustic liquids, such as acid having no effect on the cup from OBJ-294.




<!--        News        -->
<!--        News        -->
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| id="mp-right" class="MainPageBG" style="width:45%; border:2px solid #11EE11 !important; padding:0; background:#FFFFFF !important; vertical-align:top;"|
<h2 id="mp-itn-h2" style="margin:0.5em; background:#11EE11; font-family:inherit; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border-left: none; border-top: none; color:#ffffff; padding:0.2em 0.4em;"><center>News</center></h2>Hello, Doctors! Soyberg here with another heckin blogpost. Regarding the previous news bulletin, I've been slowly warming up to the Soysphere again, realizing life outside of it is boring as shit. As such, this website WILL be worked on and I WILL be more active within it. Thanks for over 80 pages, I couldn't have done it without my Wife's boyfriend's permission.  
<h2 id="mp-itn-h2" style="margin:0.5em; background:#11EE11; font-family:inherit; font-size:120%; font-weight:bold; border-left: none; border-top: none; color:#ffffff; padding:0.2em 0.4em;"><center>News</center></h2>Hello, little goyim. It's Dr. Soyberg again.
It's been a hot minute since I've been on the Sharty and the post quality has gone down the drain. But I'm not here to bitch and complain about der Sharty again, instead I want to say thank you to the people that have so far contributed to this website and the worldbuilding they've put into every article. Specifically, thank you to the people that have stayed around updating articles. I swear, some of you have autism. I mean seriously, this pretty much a DNB of a website as much as that sucks to say. Nonetheless, this website will stay up with the help of my good 'ol pal Angeleno. A few months ago, I was hoping to overhaul this website, but with school (and me being a lazy selfish little fuck) starting back up again, it'll have to be on the backburner for now.
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<!--        Writing A New File        -->
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Writing a new file is easy! For a new patient file, just search up an untaken Patient page (e.g Patient-XXX) and click '''Create an Article'''. You can also write a new patient file from the [[Main Page]]. There is a link that also says '''Create an Article'''. Similarly, you can click on a dead link, and the wiki will prompt you to create an article.
 
Of course you aren't limited to writing about a Patient. You can also write about a doctor or an anomalous object. You can also write a Lore article, which is about a Location or an Incident.
 
When creating a Patient File, it is recommended to click the add button, select ''Add Template'', then search up ''Patientbox''. From there, you can click on the box, then click ''Edit''. From there, you'll see a button that reads ''Show Options''. Check every option, except for the last option, unless you're nesting an article. There is also a Doctorbox and and Objectbox. These work similarly.
 
=== Inspiration ===
You can get inspired by one of the 'jaks in your 'jak folder. You can also come up with something out of the blue, or try to put a Soysylum-style twist on an entry from the Soyjak Wiki. If you're completely new to the Soysylum format, it is recommended that you read the existing patient files first, and learn from them. You can also edit your own article, if you think it needs some polishing.
 


-Dr. Soyberg     
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Latest revision as of 13:23, 31 August 2025

>ACCESSING CLEARANCE DATA...
>PLEASE INPUT YOUR PASSWORD.
>NUS01C4C4H8T3R41
>PASSWORD: ACCEPTED. WELCOME BACK, DR. SOYBERG.

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